Thursday, October 26, 2006

a walk in the dark

black on black. no stars. walking along paseo, passing everyone by. everyone passing me by. staring ahead but not really seeing anything. wondering if the rest of them are like me. wondering if they can really see me. am i here? no one seems to be acknowledging me. this is worse than being a ghost. to live but to live like i am dead. living but wasting away.

how many streets must i walk before i can be seen. felt. heard. everyone going their own way. me going on with mine. it is too dark to see my shadow. i don't feel 'here.' if i am here then why does it feel like i am very far away.


i don't want eternity if it means wandering like this. no final destination. always searching. feeling left behind, leaving others behind. never belonging anywhere or to anyone.

i stood beside the lamp post. beside the only light. awash in light, but deep inside i am slowly being eaten away by the dark. deep inside i am colder than any winter night. .

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